actually, with regards to the therapist not asking about assigned homework at the next sessions, i believe it is because they want clients to take ownership of their problem/solution.. and therefore they are trained not to ask. because to them, if you don’t bring it up, it probably means you don’t care enough about your own recovery.

i think.

this is probably not true for ALL therapists… but it’s my guess.

That feeling definitely ties into my fear of being needy…I worry that I am making too many appointments, that I don’t really need them if my therapist doesn’t beg me to come or something. I also have the same worry about being too needy outside of therapy – I view it as my therapists job to deal with me once a week, and not outside of that time. Interestingly, as a medical student I have now had to confront that from the opposite end, and realize that I would actually be upset if a patient of mine didn’t feel comfortable calling me outside of office hours to ask me a question! I don’t view those after-visit calls as intrusive or overbearing, I view it as part of my job, not an extra to it. I am now trying to remember that when it comes to me – that these professionals feel the same way, that they wouldn’t have gone into this profession if they didn’t really want all that goes with it.

I had a major freakout in Dec. when I found out that my mom (and maybe my dad) had been reading my blog). We’re talking FREAK OUT!!!! She offered to call me on a Saturday, but I was going to be with people all day so that was not an option. So, she said she’d call me Sunday. We talked for a half hour and I felt AWFUL for taking up her time. She kept saying that she wouldn’t have offered if she didn’t want to do it. I still feel bad about it. I even feel bad when I email her sometimes.

As for the homework thing. Mine asked me to make a list about something the other day and I didn’t do it because I knew she wouldn’t bring it up or ask me about it again. Ha! She didn’t mention it. See, I saved myself some time.

When I first started watching “In Treatment” I wasn’t seeing a therapist, but I had spent about 4 years in a combination of individual and group (mostly group) therapy while I was in grad school. Like you, when Paul said that Sophie was testing him I thought back to my previous experience with therapy and wondered if I had tested my therapist.

Thinking back I really don’t feel like I tested her too much. There were however, certain things that I specifically didn’t say. I left out these things probably in an attempt to get her to probe, which she didn’t do to an extreme. It sounds weird, but I think I respect her for that. Although I really trusted her, I think there were some things that I wasn’t really ready to tackle. Plus I wasn’t being completely honest with her – she was good, but no one is a mind reader.

Your post has gotten me to think about my new therapist and wether or not I am testing him (I have a male therapist now and that’s another big ball of string that I will have to eventually, unravel). I think I am, but I think I am a little more intentional about it than I have been in the past. I am also approaching therapy in a different way this time around – with complete and naked honesty. (Completely scary, btw)

My current therapist is actually in the middle of a test and is passing (for now). Basically I am a little worried that I have gotten too obsessive with my exercise, so I mentioned it in therapy a few weeks ago. We discussed the issue and then let it drop. Right now he is passing this test because he validated my concerns and brought it up again last week. Next week we will see if he continues to pass with flying colors because the compulsion is actually getting a bit worse. I think he needs to check back in – but I’m not necessarily confident that he will.

Huh – maybe he is testing me to see if I will bring it up again – I know, I’m a head case