Anorexic Handwriting
anorexic handwriting: small, meticulous, and linear — font-like.
I’ve been told more than once that I have “anorexic handwriting.” Aside from the fact that this label is very non-PC, I never really put eating disorders and handwriting together. When I was inpatient, I remember this girl had really, REALLY tiny handwriting. We’re talking microscopic, get out your magnifying glass-tiny. I’ve had both a nutritionist and therapist refer to my handwriting as “anorexic.” How exactly are you supposed to respond to that, by the way? Um, thanks? I’m working on it? (I would like to note, though, that the girl I knew with teeny tiny writing has since recovered from anorexia and changed her handwriting–interesting, don’t you think?)
Googling “anorexic handwriting” is pretty much a waste of time (there is one scientific article on the subject, which I will admit I have not read)… but I did read up a bit on “graphotherapy.” I’d never heard of it myself, so to quickly explain (from The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Handwriting Analysis):
A specialized branch of graphology sometimes referred to as ‘graphotherapy’ is actually a form of handwriting remediation. It makes sense that if handwriting is a true reflection of one’s psyche and the result of accumulated experiences, that changes made deliberately to handwriting can help one change uncomfortable personality traits.
Some systems of graphotherapy require the client to make changes to bits and pieces of their handwriting. For instance, the client might be instructed to change his writing slant, raise his t-bars, or adjust his lower loops. While changing one’s t-crossings might not be a big deal, meddling with the lower zone is.
In effect, making changes directly to the handwriting is like ripping away the client’s defenses without replacing them with something more positive. This kind of graphotherapy can be very damaging.
….hmmm, interesting. Maybe I should go back and add this information to my, Who said therapy couldn’t hurt anyone? post.
Using a series of writing movement patterns can help the writer make changes from the inside out, rather than the band-aid effect of changing bits and pieces of handwriting. Some amazing results have been reported by graphologists working with clients to change what they view as undesirable traits.
In Tucson, Ron Laufer has received media attention for his work with anorexic and bulimic clients. These young women had tried numerous other treatment without success, but the graphotherapy exercises seemed to make the difference.
So, next thing you know, there will be ED graphotherapy group. Right between Equestrian therapy and psychodrama…
Anyway, if I had to connect EDs and handwriting….
- Perfectionism — a common trait among individuals with eating disorders. Why wouldn’t this extend into handwriting?
- OCD — again, common among those with anorexia.
- Control — I hate to perpetuate the “eating disorders are about control” theory, but I could tie EDs, handwriting, and control together.
- Obsession with being small – okay, a stretch, but small handwriting and small bodies… why not.
Personally, I’m a little neurotic about handwriting. I will erase and re-write words and sentences if I think something is messy or if I make a mistake. Sometimes I’ll start all over with a new piece of paper. Let’s say I’m writing a card… sometimes I’ll write three versions of it (with different spacing and/or colors) and then choose the version that I think is the best. A little OCDish, yes.
Also… the physical act of writing is therapeutic for me. Some days when I am so anxious about work and just cannot get started, I will sit there and write a copy of my to-do list. Heck, I’ll find a psych article online that I like and take notes. Just because focusing on the letters and the organization of the paper somehow helps my anxiety. So…. maybe I just have nice handwriting from so much practice.
Just something to think about..
(because I know you are now just DYING to see it — this is a clip from a food log of mine from… oh gosh, I don’t know, sophomore year of college?)
I have “anorexic handwriting.” Before my eating disorder, my handwriting wasn’t nearly as miniscule and meticulously written as it is now. My handwriting is so small that I’ve had professors and teachers threaten to fail me if I don’t write bigger. Perhaps there should be a study on this.
this is REALLY interesting, actually. i’m so fascinated by handwriting and the science of it all.. even the art of it all. there’s so much you can tell about a person by their motions on paper.
my handwriting is a really neat mix (neat like clean, not like, “hey, NEAT-O”) of scripts & print. i love it. it’s very tiny, though. my school assignments used to be altered; when kids had to write a page in class, i only had to write half a page. they hated how tiny it was, but they worked with it. i even tried to write bigger, but it slowly got smaller and by the end of my page, it was my regular size again. maybe there is a connection.. it’s certainly interesting to look into.
p.s. i freaking LOVE garden state
Tina — any idea why your handwriting is smaller now? Do you just not like the look of it bigger?
emmy — scan it! I’d love to see it.
and for both of you — did you handwriting ever change while in recovery?
After I abandoned our beautiful, handwritten, and illustrated food logs,
I started typing mine,
and Jannette commented at a point when I WAS getting more restrictive,
“What’s up with the anorexic font?”
and at the time I was just like “Dude, it’s normal font. Maybe you are old and need reading glasses.”
but I think I got into this mindset of smaller, cleaner, neater, less….
but that is computer font, not handwriting, so not completely on task with your theory
but for me I abandoned handwriting completely because it just couldn’t possibly be neat enough.
Now I just don’t keep food logs or journal or do treatment at all. ha ha. I dunno if that is a positive shift and/or aligned with recovery, or….I just got bored….or what.
but my handwriting has actually continued to get smaller and neater throughout my lifetime, which pleases me greatly, because I had ugly handwriting in the past, and I’ve worked hard on it!
It is sometimes tiny, but I attribute that to the small spaces on work forms that I’ve had to adjust to.
Does this mean I can blame my mentalness on the teacher who made me do handwriting practice because it was neat enough?
My handwriting changes on a minute to minute basis. I’ve always just put this down to the RSI in my wrist, but hey…
It’s not particularly neat though, or small. Mhmm, now I feel like a fraud.
Differently
PS Your handwriting is so neat, I am jealous.
Does this mean I can blame my mentalness on the teacher who made me do handwriting practice because it was neat enough?
My handwriting changes on a minute to minute basis. I’ve always just put this down to the RSI in my wrist, but hey…
It’s not particularly neat though, or small. Mhmm, now I feel like a fraud.
Differently
PS Your handwriting is so neat, I am jealous.
I have “anorexic handwriting” as well. It’s small and very, very neat. I think you are right about the perfectionism and OCD – when I was a kid, I would spend ridiculous amounts of time practicing my handwriting, trying to get it perfect. If I wrote something and it wasn’t neat enough, I’d throw it out and start over. I have been told that I have handwriting “like a kindergarten teacher.” LOL.
I love this post
I’ve always wondered if there was a connection between eating disorders and handwriting. I know for me, I used to have much larger font. However, over the past six or so years, it’s gotten much smaller. And when, I was in an extreme restrictive state, it was incredibly tiny. My boss used to tell me to write bigger all the time. That was the time when my self esteem was very low too.
Since being in a more recovered sort of state, 1) I found large type fonts don’t appeal to my eye much. It’s one reason why I stick to Times New Roman when typing. 2) My handwriting hasn’t changed even if I really wanted to, it would appear very odd looking to me now.
In general, really messy, ineligible writing bothers me. Sometimes, I think Dr.s need to take handwriting classes.
I enjoyed your post. Just wanted anyone reading this that is struggling to check out this ministry:
http://www.mercyministries.org
Mercy Ministries was founded by Nancy Alcorn in 1983. It is a non-profit residential counseling program that exists to transform the lives of young women between the ages of 13-28 who face life-controlling issues. The program is free of charge, which is pretty amazing. I want to spread the awareness about Mercy because these problems are all too real in today’s society!
Take Care!
From a Handwriting Analysis point of view, the tiny handwriting indicates extreme focus, and in this case of eating disorders, the focus would be on the physical appearance. In a sense, you can look at it as a possible desire to “disappear” or be less visible, the less visible the writing is. Control is a huge issue, and focus brought down to such a degree is very typical of exercising extreme control. Not related to HA, but a simple technique of visualization that might help in any situation where you might feel you are losing control is to visualize you holding the situation/the person/yourself in the open palm of your hand, gently and lovingly. And know that, like water would flee a palm closing into a fist, the person/situation is going to “take flight” once the extreme control is applied. Be loving and gentle with yourself, and you will hold onto more of who you truly are; this visualization can help.
wow my handwriting looks exactly like yours. although it tends to get a little more messy when i’ve been writing pages and pages. i also write in capital letters sometimes but its still quite identical to yours; which is lovely by the way. although i don’t tend to make it so pretty anymore, just writing in the same pen. for quite a while now i have only written in black felt tip pen (must not be blunt). and yes i have anorexia nervosa, so maybe there is a link. a friend of mine has ridiculously neat, similar handwriting and she doesn’t have an ED, although i know she has had anxiety issues in the past at least… in terms of the small writing, i used to often make my letters much taller and more narrow than typical “fonts”… i remember wondering about whether there was some sort of relationship, but i had forgotten until now. it’s interesting because if it is real, i doubt it’s often picked up…
There is a considerable list of Scientific evidence to back up the veracity of Graphology. If you go to my web site, please move down the 1st page, and download “Resource list of Scientific Studies for Handwriting Analysis” – Professor Peter Beumont (who was a personal friend of mine) was an expert on eating disorders, Bulemic and Anorexic etc, and he wrote a dissertation on the connection between small HW and the maladies. HW analysis is unfortunately treated by people who have little or zero knowledge of the subject, as a party piece.
Some Psychologists are prone to protecting their ivory towers, and criticize HW analysis findings when they themselves have ZERO knowledge of the subject. I have personally shown, on many occasions, IN PRACTICE, that where Pre-Employment interviews/analysis is done, Psychometric testing is found wanting, and often WRONG – my colleagues in the field – Psychologists AND Graphologists agree that Psychometric results can be fudged……so where does that stand up? Graphology is NOT a Party piece.