How quickly do you open up in therapy?
This could have been such a great article, had the question just been tweaked a little bit. (Therapy Watch: Diving In – How quickly should you open up in therapy?) Rather than “How quickly should you open up in therapy?” I think that “How quickly do you open up in therapy?” Or, since the article paneled all therapists…. “How quickly do your patients open up in therapy?”
I think that there are few “shoulds” in therapy (although I can think of a lot of should-nots!), but I am curious to know how long it takes others to settle in with a new therapist… I’m sure there are so many different variables (situation, diagnosis, type of therapist, previous treatment history, age, frequency of treatment, etc.), but how long does it take you to feel comfortable with a new T?
If I had to answer the question myself, my response would be, “Depends — how insightful is the therapist?”
If the therapist is going to wait for me to come out of my shell and tell her my story when I decide the time is right… it will probably never happen. Why bother? I need some indication of interest or insight or something. A couple of months back, my neurologist put two and two together (Wellbutrin + amenorrhea) and asked if I had any history of anorexia. And then if I had had an MRI because it could be hypothalamic amenorrhea. These questions of course lead to, “Well… ,” which leads to information that my therapist in college probably never even knew.
I’m not advocating a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy… but it sure does help the “opening-up” process when you ask the right questions.
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[...] Anxiety Disorder And OCD Treatments wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerpt This could have been such a great article, had the question just been tweaked a little bit. (Therapy Watch: Diving In – How quickly should you open up in therapy?) Rather than “How quickly should you open up in therapy?” I think that “How quickly do you open up in therapy?” Or, since the article paneled all therapists…. “How quickly do your patients open up in therapy?” I think that there are few “shoulds” in therapy (although I can think of a lot of should-nots!), but I am curious to know ho [...]
[...] S wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptThis could have been such a great article, had the question just been tweaked a little bit. (Therapy Watch: Diving In – How quickly should you open up in therapy?) Rather than “How quickly should you open up in therapy?” I think that “How quickly do you open up in therapy?” Or, since the article paneled all therapists…. “How quickly do your patients open up in therapy?” I think that there are few “shoulds” in therapy (although I can think of a lot of should-nots!), but I am curious to know how long it takes others to settle in with a new therapist… I’m sure there are so many different variables (situation, diagnosis, type of therapist, previous treatment history, age, frequency of treatment, etc.), but how long does it take you to feel comfortable with a new T? If I had to answer the question myself, my response would be, “Depends […] [...]
I saw the “emergency” therapist for three weeks before I got an appointment with the therapist that was to be come my “regular” therapist.
Due to the “emergency” nature, that first one knew what I wrote on the form… one of those things being that I purged (among many other things going on in my life). It was something that I avoided talking about at all costs.
When I was switched to my “regular” therapist, who was the eating disorders case manager, I wouldn’t talk to her about food or eating or purging or any of it. I was too scared in the situation and much more willing to talk about my fears of graduation, my problems with friends, my anxiety about money and jobs, etc… The overall setting freaked me out and I just stopped going.
So, how quickly *did* I open up? Never.
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Being 51 years old, I have a long history and mine is , as they say, among the most complicated they have heard. Although I am no longer in therapy I was right up to a few years ago. I check out for the chemistry first by asking questions – sort of an interview for the therapist. I have standards I’m looking for going in. Maybe I’m different than most but I feel if he/she is getting paid, they are working for me. I’m the customer and I want my money’s worth! Once I get a feel for whether or not it is someone I am comfortable with I begin rattling off my life story as quickly as possible (sounding manic but I’m not I just don’t waste time), always with notes in hand for memory sake. I figure I’ve got 45 minutes, and that’s as long as there are no interruptions. If he/she can’t keep up or tries to take me off course I get them right back, by saying, “Excuse me, but I was talking about….” After that appointment all the cards have all been laid out. that’s when we can start nit picking. I never allow myself to feel inferior to the doctor. I want a sounding board and good advice. If it’s bad I say so. I view the doctor and I as a tag team both fighting a common enemy – the disorder, disease, what have you. When I was younger and newly married, at the height of my disorder, my husband accompanied me to all my appointments to fill in the blanks. In fact he still does on ocassion since there are bigger blanks to fill now a days.